First Posted on March 31, 2012 by alisonball
Many years ago I asked a friend of mine who was wanting to practice her new found skill of calligraphy to write out for me one of the wise pieces from Kahill Gibran’s “The Prophet”. I had liked it for a long time so I had it framed and it has hung in my workroom ever since. It hangs there as a silent reminder if I am ever inclined to forget, of what is truly important for me in my work with the people I have seen over many years. Here it is:
“No man can reveal to you aught but that which already lies half asleep in the dawning of your knowledge. The teacher gives not of his wisdom but rather of his faith and lovingness. If he is indeed wise he does not bid you enter the house of his wisdom but rather leads you to the threshold of your own mind.”
Since my childhood surname was Wisdom it has always seeemed incumbent on me to contemplate these words carefully and the thoughts, at least some of the time, stop me from ever assuming that I know what the person with me needs to learn. If I stop long enough to allow them the space- THEY will tell me what they already know is best for them and what they need to do. And in telling me they somehow re-learn it or consolidate it for themselves. Rather than a cognitive learning of strategies, they somehow just “find themselves acting differently”.
There are of course other important guiding principles but this one is critical to enable the people who come to see us as psychotherapists, to really feel heard and understood.